Marriage is beautiful.

When entering into a marriage one ought to ask oneself: do you believe you are going to enjoy talking with this [man or] woman up into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory, but most of the time you are together will be devoted to conversation. - Friedrich Nietzsche

Last summer, I noticed a book written by Tara Parker-Pope who is a columnist for the New York Times. Her book, entitled, For Better: The Science of a Good Marriage, obviously intrigued me, as was an almost-married and very practical person. "The science of marriage?" I thought, "Does that mean there is an equation for making it work?" More recently, Pope has written an article in her weekly New York Times "Well" blog entitled "Sustainable Love".

Interestingly enough, Pope's article discusses--at least initially--the supposed shift of focus from the relationship of marriage to the growth of the individual. Essentially, marriages are less about practicality and more about personal, emotional satisfaction. The article does, however, lead to what I believe to be a more realistic concept: if you want to grow and be enriched as an individual, and your spouse assists in that development? Awesome.

Ultimately, I think that Pope's article really is about the relationship, and that it serves as a reminder that your spouse isn't just that person you share a space and finances with. If your marriage is about both individuals becoming better people (and doing so with each other's assistance), then it is--scientifically speaking--likely a lot more sustainable.

All that to be said, the last five months of my life have definitely been months of growth and enrichment, due largely in part because of my spouse. I've decided that in blogging about my marriage, I'm not going to write about all the fluffy/happy/emotional stuff. Rather (and in light of Pope's writing), I'm going to praise God for the positive and practical things in my marriage.

Certainly the last five months have been a challenge. Leaving a close-knit group of friends and moving across the country has been an adventure, to say the very least. And finding a new job to sustain our 'household' while my husband pursues his masters' degree was also a challenge. All of this (and the many other changes that occurred in the closing months of 2010) has brought me closer to my spouse and made me a better person. Boom. Marriage = sustainable.

--- chRistie